Her Cold-Hearted Alpha Chapter 38 by desirenovel
Lying To Myself
I don’t remember it . All I remember is Darien screaming at me to get a grip . I came to , only to realise the entire hallway was fucking destroyed . Blood was fucking everywhere and Rayhan was a bloody mess . I won’t lie , I felt fucking guilty seeing him like that , but the fucker kept pushing me . This is why I prefer to be alone . No one around me to piss me off , n o one to risk hurting . I told you it was all I could fucking do : inflict pain , cause pain .
It’s what I was good at … I stormed upstairs , not caring about anything as they rushed Rayhan to the hospital . I didn’t care if Rafael flipped or not . Maybe I just wanted to hear it from him , rather than just sense it and see it in his eyes . I wanted him to scream that I was a fucking monster , just like everyone else thinks I am . Was that the reason I kept lashing out at the fucking kid ? Got to admit he was pretty good … I looked at the marks that covered my entire torso . Fucker … I dropped into my office chair , irritated to find that Kiara’s torn clothes were gone .
The room was cleaned and I couldn’t even smell her . Where the fuck did they all go ? I didn’t give a shit anyway … I took a packet of cigarettes from my drawer and lit one up , taking a long drag . Kiara . I couldn’t get her out of my mind … I had hurt her ; I knew I shouldn’t have kissed her but I couldn’t stop myself . I stared at the ceiling , not even moving when I heard Darien enter and run up the stairs . Did he want to die too ?
The door opened and he glared at me . ” Alejandro . ” I didn’t reply , not even bothering to turn my attention to him . ” Seriously Alejandro , what happened ? ” ” I’m just considering if I should fucking castrate you or tear your head off . ” I said , looking at him murderously . He sighed . ” Tell me , man . ” He said , closing the door behind him . ” I fucked Kiara last night . ” I said .
He gasped , like a fucking girl . Do men ever gasp ? I looked at him . Was he for fucking real ? ” What ?! You what ?! Elijah ! Alpha Elijah is going to fucking kill you dude ! ” Yeah , this is why I don’t like telling him shit . ” I’m not scared of that dickhead . ” ” Well , he and your brother together might be able to do some damage . Throw i n Rayhan and Liam … ” Darien said . ” I’m so fucking scared . ” I said mockingly . ” Alejandro , why the hell would you fuck a teen ? ” He asked , rubbing his forehead . ” She’s a woman . ” I said carelessly , remembering her perfectly smooth skin … her pussy … Pleasure rushed south and I pushed the thoughts away . ” You usually go for women over twenty at least … ” He remarked . Yeah , he wasn’t fucking wrong … But there was something about her … ” Who knows ? I found her fucking sexy , so I fucked her . She wanted it just as much as I did . ” I said coldly . ” That’s hard to believe . ” He scoffed . ” She’s a sweet young woman . ” ” Who doesn’t want a piece of me ? ” I said arrogantly . ” Me . ” He said glaring at me .
Well , someone wasn’t in a fucking good mood . ” I’m still pissed off , so better watch it . ” I warned , my eyes flashing dangerously . ” Ok fine , so then what happened ? ” He asked , sighing in defeat . ” Then I ignored her , agreed to marry Jasmin , then went and kissed her in front of Jasmin – who let it out that we were engaged . She ran out , Rayhan tried playing the fucking knight in shining fucking armour and I snapped . ” I said in my ‘ I don’t give a fuck ‘ tone . He looked confused and shocked .
Probably more because of my unbothered attitude . ” Ok , about Jasmin … Are you sure ? ” He asked quietly . ” I need someone to play the role , I won’t b e tied to her . ” I said firmly , puffing out smoke . ” You will have to mark her . 11 ” Yeah , if I want fucking kids . Which I don’t … ” ” No. If she is to be the Queen of this pack , will need to mark her . ” then you ” I ” Then I will , but she’s not marking me . ” said , firmly tossing the cigarette butt into an ashtray and taking up another .
My entire neck was covered in tattoos , a decision I made years ago … No one will ever mark me . I was no one’s fucking bitch . That was the plan even when I hadn’t minded the idea of a mate . ” Having a mate is a beautiful thing . Destined or not … Do what makes you happy Alejandro , not what is expected or what you think is best . ” He said quietly . ” I always do whatever the fuck I want . ” I shot back . ” Yeah , what you want , not what makes you happy . ” He countered , now crossing his arms . ” Look … Rayhan’s in quite a bad state … ” I don’t care . Get the fuck out .
” My tone held finality , my anger igniting once more . He just looked at me , knowing he wasn’t going to get more out of me . Not if he wanted to make it back to his mate and daughter alive . His gaze locked with mine for a few seconds before he lowered his head in submission and then walked out . The door shut with a click and I stared at the ceiling once again . Sooner or later I’d probably kill Jasmin in a fit of anger , that’s why she was ultimately the better option .
I wouldn’t give a fuck if she died … But Kiara Fuck , she had done something to me … 2 I sat up , mind linking Callum . ‘ What’s happening down there ? ‘ I asked coldly . ‘ Alpha , Rayhan is almost fully healed . ‘ ‘ Wasn’t he in a bad state ? ” I asked , frowning . ” Yes , but there is something I need to tell you . It’s about Miss Kiara and Rayhan’s current state . ‘ He said , excitement barely contained in his voice . I frowned deeply . What exactly was going on ? ‘ T’ll stop by later … ‘ I walked through the silent hospital hall . I twas past midnight and everyone was mostly asleep . I was pondering over what Callum had just told me .
So , I had been correct , there was something different about Kiara … Kiara was definitely different , not to mention having the blood of one of the oldest werewolf families . I hadn’t really ever heard of healer wolves , nor had I ever come across the name Asheton before . I wasn’t one for research and history anyway . Not unless it involved Lycan’s and that was research I did fucking years ago … Callum had said she would have special abilities aside from the healing . My was , if no one even knew of her ability and even I could barely sense it , how did the wendigos track her down ? Something wasn’t adding up . Witches could be the answer , but how capable are witches ? The smell of hazelnut chocolate overcame me and I knew she was close .
I made sure no one saw me as I slipped down the hall until I reached her room . What was I doing here ? I hesitated but I couldn’t stop myself . I needed to see her … Opening the door , I slid inside her room , silently shutting the door behind me . There she lay on the bed in a clingy oversize shirt . The only light was the moon shining in through the window , emphasising her perfect body . A thin sheet draped over her from her waist down . Didn’t they leave a lamp or light on for her ? I frowned as I pushed the thought away . Why do I fucking care ? I looked at her once more . One hand rested above her head on the pillow and the other was loosely draped over her waist . Her breasts rose and fell rhythmically .
A fucking siren , that’s what she was . Without even trying , she had fucking messed with my head … I inched closer . Her heritage was a surprise , and something inside of me told me she was the type of queen I needed . The befitting Queen to stand by my side , but the two of u s were just too different to ever fucking work .
I was too fucking far gone , and dangerous . I know I can’t say it was just the sex I craved . Well , I did want that , but I’ll admit that I cared too that was the reason she would never be an option . Being by my side would make her a target . Although I knew she was already a target , I wouldn’t make it worse for her . Besides , monsters didn’t love .
I slowly brushed the few stray strands of hair that hung over her face back , before letting my knuckles brush down her soft cheek . She pouted in her sleep , nuzzling her cheek against my hand . I smirked slightly . She was fucking cute … Her lashes touched her cheeks as she slept and her plump lips were parted slightly . She was the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on . Yeah , I admit shit like that in my head , but I wouldn’t fucking dare say it out aloud .
She turned on her side and I slowly moved my hand away , watching as she tucked both hands under her cheek , relaxing once again . I crouched down near the hospital bed , my face inches from her own . It had fucking hurt when she had run from that room , seeing her so fucking vulnerable like that … I was sorry for being such a fucking dick t o her , but I wasn’t sorry for fucking her or for that kiss … It was all I wanted , to fuck her one more time . Who am I kidding ? One more time or ten more times . I’d never get tired of her , and that was all the more reason to stay away . If I could .
I leant forward , placing a soft kiss on her lips , relishing in her sweet taste . I felt her breath hitch and swiftly moved away as she stirred . Her heart rate quickened as she moaned , beginning to wake up . I needed to stop doing this … Every touch , every kiss , was messing with my fucking head and body , in more ways than one .
I was out the door , leaning against the wall by the time she sat up . ” Is someone there ? ” She called out , her soft husky voice slightly thicker than usual . I didn’t move or reply , remaining a s silent as possible . After a moment , I heard her sigh softly and I wondered what she was thinking . ” You must be dreaming Kia . ” She murmured before laying down once again .
I silently made my way out of the hospital . I was going to leave on business later in the evening . But right now , I needed to get away from here and maybe it was best I left earlier . With all the pent – up emotions and frustration that coursed through me , I needed to vent somewhere . What better way than to find a fucking Rogue hideout ?